Sunday, December 7, 2008

Not enough time

Have you ever noticed how there's just not enough time for anything? I don't just mean for work but for everything. I mean, sure, not enough time to do housework or Christmas shopping...........that's given. What I mean is time to enjoy everything that comes in between. I have 2 sons. One is less than a month away from turning 20. I'm sad because all this time has passed since he was born and how much of it did I take to enjoy him as a child? I spent the last 20 years working my butt off trying to make ends meet, thinking it was the best I could do for him. I guess I just don't think you can count the time you spend trying to survive as "living"time. Now that I have my 2 year old Nick, I try to remember things about Brandon at the same age and just too much time has passed. I don't remember. I was too busy trying to get by and survive to actually live. How can I change that? Now that I'm older it seems like time is passing too quickly adapt to. It seems like yesterday that Nick was born and now he's 2 1/2 and talking and growing so fast that sometimes I don't remember things he did a year ago. In 18 years will I be writing a blog about missing out on Nicks life because I spent too much of my limited time just getting by? What do you have to give up for the sake of something important. So let's see what is important. Of course you have to have an income, so working is important (give that 9 hours of your day including commute time). You need basic biological necessities, so sleep and food are important (we'll give that 9 hours of your day also...8 for sleep and a total of 1 for meals). Hygiene is a good thing ( give that one 1 hour counting all bathroom trips throughout the day). What does that add up to, 19 hours a day. That leaves only 5 hours a day for everything else. Do we really cut ourselves down to 5 hours of actual living time each day? That doesn't even count laundry, housekeeping and grocery shopping. What do you sacrifice?

My first official post!

Welcome! Welcome to my head!! Well, not really but close enough. I decided to start this because thoughts are like poop. If you don't get it out then the back up will cause lots of problems :-) My posts will probably be all over the place, that's why I call it random thoughts.

I'll start here with a little history. I grew up in Southern California. The baby and the only girl. Had my first child at 19, got married, moved to Las Vegas, developed a compulsive gambling habit, suffered many years of infertility, followed by many years of re-current miscarriage, had my second child at 37, loaded everything into a truck and moved the family to Northern Colorado, got a job in a hospital. That's me, the abridged version. If you would like any further information about my journey thus far, just ask. I view all of my life experiences, good and bad, as part of the lesson my soul was sent here to learn and I can't wait to see what lessons I have in my future.